New Normal

Has it really been one week since Lyla and I returned home?

Time has gone by fast, and has been rather busy too!

It is hard to believe that we have already had Lyla in our arms over a month as well!

As far as the adjusting goes,  she has done fabulous!  She has not thrown one tantrum, and she just fits right in to our little  family!  🙂

I had a phone conversation with a friend the other day, and she said something that I had not really thought about… She was asking about the adjustment and how everyone was doing.  She asked me if I realized that we had gone from having two children to five children in 18 months.  I really had not.

We have been adjusting for 18 months now.

But, there are several things I have observed this past week in our new normal:

Lyla needs constant affirmation, which we are all totally willing to give and to encourage her with.  But when I say constant, I mean constant.  For example today she was eating her lunch and every time she took a bite, she wanted me to clap for her.  I remind myself often that she has never had anyone cheer for her and clap for her in all the little things she has done like my others.

Lyla does not sit still.  I don’t know if it is because she is overstimulated with all we have in our house, if she is curious, or if she has tones of energy.  She is in constant motion.  She does not really watch TV.  Occasionally she will sit and watch something for about 5 minutes, but then she is off and exploring again.  I had heard about the TV thing from other moms.  None of their kids watch TV either.  This is sometimes a little challenging, because I never get much of a break.  However, it has caused us all to watch TV less and play more together…which is a really good thing.  I have mentioned before that this adoption is making me a better parent.  Here is another example.

Lyla is eating well. She has not denied anything.  There are some things I can tell she does not like over others…Like bread.  The girl does not eat a slice of bread, she won’t eat sandwiches.  I am working on this one.  She will be eating a PB&J sandwich, by gosh golly!  But for the most part, her eating is going  well!

Clothing wise, she is officially wearing a 2T and a size 5 shoe… the exact same size as my 18 month old.

Language… she is picking up on words, but still not doing much more than mimicking.  She will say a few words on her own.  We are trying really hard to make her talk.  We got used to using our hands and motions to talk, so now we are breaking those habits and forcing her to talk.  She is doing great!  She says Mama, water, get down, teeth, bath, Daddy, Katy Pierce, baby, potty… she doesn’t always say these without prompting, but she does some.  I think she is really smart!  She will be speaking English in no time!

Potty training is also going pretty good.  I can’t remember if I have posted much about this before, but she was mostly potty trained when we got her from the orphanage.  They sent her to us with a pull up on.  She signals to go potty, but I think using an actual toilet was new for her.  She is also so tiny, so it is difficult for her to get on a toilet.  During our month in India, she pretty much got potty trained, and we worked on getting fully trained.  Now that we are back home, she has a stool that she can use to climb on the toilet.  She still signals to me that she needs to go, even calls my name and then raises her pinky. (the sign for toilet)  I am trying to teach her now that she can just go on her own.  I think she only notifies me now, because she wants the light on.  🙂  She is doing great!

Sleeping… she slept in our bed the first two nights, and then showed interest in being in her own bed, in a room she shares with KP.  She has been there ever since and has slept soundly each night.  She has always been a great sleeper since we have had her.  However, she is a crazy sleeper…she reminds me of my Levi.  I often find her upside down in her bed and when she slept with us… she slept sideways or tried to crawl over us and lay on top of us.

Bonding… she has really bonded well.  She is tight with Scott and I and now tight with her siblings!  She greets her older brothers with a hug each day when they come home from school.  She chases KP around the house, and they play together all day.  She helps me with her baby brother by feeding him a bottle, and she is always making him laugh!

Speaking of siblings…  They have been awesome!

I feel a little sorry for my bios.  Lyla is definitely the center of attention every where we go, but I think they are handling it all pretty well.  I was excited yesterday when someone from church brought us a meal and they brought a gift.  She told me it was for all of the kids.  When I told the kids they had a present, Seth said…”it’s probably for Lyla.”  When he learned it was for all of them they all got excited. It was nice of her to think of all of them.  But, I can understand all the buzz about Lyla, all of our friends, especially our church family… have walked this whole journey with us and are wanting to see her.  It’s kind of like having a newborn…Our bios just cant remember the fan fare and the parties that were thrown in their honor when they arrived.

I could not be more proud of my two oldest, Seth and Levi.  I think they were a little let down on their very first time meeting Lyla.  I think they expected her to be as excited as them, and she was a little scared and shy at first and glued to Scott and me.  They even have commented that she sure is getting a lot of attention.  We sat down and had a long talk about how special they are and how much they mean to us.  We explained that God has used this whole adoption process to grow us and stretch us, and now God was using it to grow and stretch them.  That this was a time when they were going to need to think more about their new sister than themselves.  And it may be that way for a little while as she gets adjusted.  They totally accepted what we said and have been such awesome big brothers.  They have been patient with her and us, and truly have been loving and doting on her, and playing with her a good bit.  I am so proud of them!  I think this adoption is not only making us better parents, but her siblings will be better siblings too!  I can’t wait to reward them with a special treat this weekend for being so awesome!

Now my little Katy Pierce, she has been struggling a little bit.  She was a little jealous at first, and not very happy about sharing her toys… this may not be so much an adoption thing, as it is an age thing.  She is just 18 months, but each day the girls are bonding more and more.   KP and Lyla love to chase each other around the house, and they take turns being the chaser. Right now,  KP is still much faster than Lyla, so Lyla often wants to be the chaser, but she is starting to get faster!  Scott and I have noticed that KP loves having Lyla sleep in the same room.  KP used to always cry when she was laid down in her crib, but now she goes right down, because her sister is in the room.  KP ultimately is doing really well…  If you consider her age, that she got a new brother a few months ago, and now a new sister.  I am proud of her too!   I got to spend some one on one time with her tonight, and that was good for the both of us.

Joel, he is my little “mellow fellow”, and he is so young… but he is just going with the flow on this next transition.  He thinks Lyla is hilarious.  He laughs at her often, even if she just crosses the room.  Lyla is very affectionate with him and often tried to help bottle feed him and tickle him.  He laughs out loud every time she is around and gives her his award winning grin!  He loves his new sister.

Here are a few pictures from the first week.